Andrew enjoys the company of women, perhaps too much. The council in heaven had enough of his sexual promiscuities and they’ve sentence him to return to earth to destroy demons. To make matters more difficult, if he has sex with a woman he has to stay an extra year. Without clothes, money, or food, his task seems impossible.
Emily is in a world of trouble. She leaves her family, job, and home in Chicago to start a new life. As she’s driving along a country road, she discovers a naked man lying in the middle of it. He’s incredibly built, sculpted to perfection, and blessed with a fine package south of his navel. When he asks for her help, she can’t resist.
Over the next several days, Emily’s sanity is tested. Andrew struggles to keep his hands to himself. Emily seeks the truth from Andrew while he endeavors to kill a demon. What she discovers frightens her. Angels, demons, heaven and hell exist. Determined to help Emily change her future, Andrew offers her a deal. But is heaven the best eternal resting place?
Tune referenced in book: Dancing with Myself
The silence in the room threatened his sanity. Finding the remote near the TV, he took it and pressed the power button. The flat screen was small, but it had a better picture compared to the boxy television sets.
He kicked off his shoes before he scooted back over the mattress. The bed was bouncy and would be perfect for having sex. A shame he couldn’t make use of his resources. After propping the pillows behind him, he flipped through the channels on the TV. He found an episode of Seinfeldplaying. He remembered watching the sitcom when it had first aired in 1989. The comedy always made him laugh.
Later, a show called Friendscame on. The sitcom kept him entertained until his phone vibrated in his pocket. He hurried to pull it out in case it was Emily. When he finally removed the cell, he noticed a message from her on the screen.
Made it back to the hotel. How are you doing?READ MORE
Smiling at the wonders of modern technology, he replied, Watching Friends. It’s not bad.
He set the phone on his thigh and resumed watching the show. A minute later, a new text from her appeared.
Ick. Friends is old.
He prepared a quick response. New to me.
Her next message arrived promptly. Seriously? Don’t they have TV in heaven?
Nope, he replied.
He held the cell, waiting for her to respond.
OMG! How did you get by without TV?? What do people do without TV??
He typed his reply.There are theatres people perform in. Most people are busy with jobs, going out with friends, having sex, spending time with family, traveling, having fun, having more sex… What’s OMG?
He placed the phone on his leg. He shook his foot as the time passed. When his phone didn’t vibrate, he pressed the button to make sure he hadn’t missed anything. The screen showed the normal picture of a field of flowers. Sad she hadn’t replied, he returned his attention to the television. But after a few minutes, he couldn’t tolerate watching the show any longer. He missed talking to Emily, even if it was only by instant messaging.
He lifted the phone and sent her a new communication. What are you doing?
Boredom started to take hold of him. He left the phone on the bed and began pacing in the room. The urge to call her was like an itch he desperately needed to scratch, but he didn’t want to be a nuisance. He kept glancing at the phone, hoping it would buzz with a response from her. When it finally did, he dove over the bed to claim the cell.
Getting clothes ready for tomorrow. Heading into shower soon. OMG is oh my god. I’m stunned there’s no TV in heaven.
Her message instantly brightened his mood. He entered his reply. Who needs TV when there are better things to do? What are you going to wear tomorrow?
He placed the phone aside and then laid his head sideways on top of his arm. So she was staying busy. That was good to know. At least she hadn’t decided to leave him stranded. He’d thought she might, especially after she tried to give him several wads of cash. He didn’t want her money. It was hers to begin with. Just because he’d won it didn’t make it his. Besides, he’d rather be with her than have any amount of money.
The phone buzzed. He jerked his head up to look at the screen.
Black dress with a wide belt. Nothing fancy.
He imagined her wearing a sexy black outfit that reached above her knees and had a low neckline to reveal her cleavage. Wait a minute. He didn’t want her to wear anything sexy for the demon. If she was going to pretty herself up, it should be for him.
No need to dress to impress. Jeans will be fine, he replied.
Now, if she dressed up nice for him, Andrew would have to let his fingers explore her body, starting with her thighs. Then again, maybe he should start with her neck and drag his touch down between her breasts. The mere thought gave him a boner.
A new message arrived from her. Not taking any chances. This dirtbag needs to go.
Don’t lead him on too much, Andrew sent back to her.
Define too much. Is kissing too much? Is letting him feel me up too much? FYI, leading him is the game plan.
Andrew’s eyes widened. She had to be kidding around. God, he hoped she was. He quickly typed a response. No touching. No kissing. If he tries, walk away. No, run!
His pulse sped as he thought about the demon touching her. He’d rip the demon’s heart out. No one was allowed to lay a finger on Emily.
A new message arrived. LOL. Chillax angel baby. I’m not into demons.
He chuckled as he prepared a reply. Are you into angels? I may know someone. He’s a good guy. Hot. Well hung. I think you’d like him.
He turned onto his side and propped his head up with his balled hand. Although he wasn’t sure what LOL stood for, he guessed it wasn’t a bad thing.
He stared at the letters, clueless as to what they stood for. What does that mean? Is that code for you want to bop his brains out?
After he sent the message, he tried to make up words for each letter. L could stand for let’s. M could be short for make. F could be for fun or funny. A could stand for apples and O for oranges. Let’s make funny apples and oranges. Maybe it was the latest phrase people used.
OMG I am LMFAO. Seriously!!COLLAPSE